Posts Tagged ‘one’

Travel And Tourist Jokes #9247

Wednesday, January 7th, 2009

A boat
docked in a tiny Mexican
village. An American tourist complimented the
Mexican fisherman on
the quality of his fish and asked how long it took
him to catch
them.

“Not very long,” answered the Mexican.

“But then, why
didn’t you stay out longer and catch more?” asked the

tourist.

The Mexican explained that his small catch was sufficient to meet
his
needs and those of his family.

The tourist asked, “So
what do you do with the rest of your time?”

“I sleep late, fish a
little, play with my children, spend time with
my wife… In the
evenings I go into the village to see my friends, have
a few drinks,
play the guitar, chase the senioras, and sing a few
songs. I have a
full life.”

The tourist said, “I have a M.B.A. from Stanford and
I can help you.
You should start by fishing longer every day. You
can then sell the
extra fish you catch. With the extra revenue
, you can buy a bigger boat.
With the extra money the larger boat
will bring, you can buy a second one
and a third one and so on
until you have an entire fleet of trawlers.
Instead of selling your
fish to a middle man, you can negotiate directly
with the processing
plants and maybe even open your own plant. You can
then leave this
little village and move to Mexico City, Los Angeles, or
even New
Jersey! From there you can direct your huge enterprise.”

“How long
would that take?” asked the Mexican.

“Twenty, perhaps
twenty-five years,” replied the tourist.

“And after that?” asked the
Mexican.

“Afterwards? That’s when it gets really interesting,”
answered the
tourist, laughing. “When your business gets really big, you
can start
selling stocks and make millions!”

“Millions?
Really?” asked the Mexican. “And after that?”

The tourist replied,
“After that you’ll be able to retire, live in a
tiny village n
ear the coast, sleep late, play with your children, catch
a few
fish, spend time with your wife, and spend your evenings drinking
and
playing the guitar with your friends!” Jewelry Jewelry Duamond Solitaire Stud Earrings 14K White Gold 10 Carat Ctw.

Bash Quote: [Loud_As_It_Getz] Yea Well[@Kittenassassin]…

Thursday, December 4th, 2008

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Parent Jokes #7768

Thursday, December 4th, 2008

Four
expectant fathers were in a
Minneapolis hospital waiting room, while
their wives were in
labor.

The nurse arrived and announced to the first man, “Congratulations

sir, you’re the father of twins.”

“What a coincidence!” the man
said with some obvious pride. “I work
for the Minnesota Twins
baseball team.”

The nurse returned in a little while and turned to the
second man,
“You, sir, are the father of triplets.”

“Wow,
that’s really an incredible coincidence,” he answered. “I
work for
the 3M Corporation. My buddies at work will never let me live
this
one down.”

An hour later, while the other two men were passing
cigars around, the
nurse came back. This time, she turned to the
third man, who had been
quiet in the corner. She announced that his
wife had just given birth to
quadruplets. Stunned, he barely could
reply.

“Don’t tell me another coincidence?” asked the nurse.
r

After finally regaining his composure, he said, “I don’t
believe it,
I work for the Four Seasons Hotel.”

After hearing
this, everybody’s attention turned to the fourth guy,
who had just
fainted, flat out on the floor. The nurse rushed to his side
and,
after some time, he slowly gained back his consciousness.

The nurse
asked, “Sir, are you all right?”

“Yes” says the man, “I’m o.k.
now. I just had a shocking thought. I
work at the 7-11 Store.” 18J White Gold 95Mm Milgrain 3 Ct Diamond Wedding Band 18K White Gold 95Mm Milgrain 3 Ct Diamond Wedding Band Jewelry,Jewelry 1 13Ct Diamond Fine Bail 14K White Gold Solitaire Pendant 1 13Ct Diamond Fine Bail 14K White Gold Solitaire Pendant,2 Carat Diamond 14K White Gold Eternity Bar Band 2 Carat Diamond 14K White Gold Eternity Bar Band Jewelry,Jewelry 5 Carat Diamond 14K White Gold Eternity Band 5 Cqrat Diamond 14K White Gold Eternity Band,Jewelry 2 12 Ct Diamond 18K Y Gold Eternity Open Jewelry,Jewelry 3 Cqrat Diamond 14K Yellow Gold Princess Eternity Band 3 Carat Diamond 14K Yellow Gold Princess Eternity Band,18J White Gold 186 Ct Bezel Set Diamond Wedding Band Jewelry 18K White Gold 186 Ct Bezel Set Diamond Wedding Band,Jewelry Jewelry Jewelry,1 12 Carat Diamond 18K Yellow Gold Eternity Bar 1 12 Carat Diamond 18K Yellow Gold Eternity Bar 1 12 Cqrat Diamond 18K Yellow Gold Eternity Bar,14J White Gold Stylish 105 Carat Diamond Bridal Set Jewelry 14J White Gold Stylish 105 Carat Diamond Bridal Set,Jewelry Jewelry Jewelry.

Need For Speed: Most Wanted Cheat: Levels Of Police Actionthe Various Levels…

Wednesday, December 3rd, 2008

Levels of police action

the various levels of police action are as follows:

Heat Level 1: Marked patorl cars and cruisers. They moslty chase and try to run you off the road. If you have a quick car, they are not hard to get away from.

Heat Level 2: Umnarked patrol cars and cruisers, roadblocks. The police mailny try to ram you off the road and setup roadblocks. Avoid roadblokcs by doing an emergency brake lock U-turn or go through them. You can get through by ramming the cars on either end of the roadblock or by going through a weak point like the sawhorse or a gap between the cars. Use Speedbreaker to see the weak point in the roadblocks and use nirtous to ram straight through. Some road bolcks will not extend all the way across the road — you can go through where they have not placed a automobile.

Heat Level 3: Marked GTO (Monaro) police cars, marked 4WDs (Rhinos), rolling road blocks, roadblocks. These are quicker and you need to use objects to knock down in front of them to disable them. Lead the chase with these vehicles through the cities to use knock down pionts (for example, the giant donut sign, etc.) to disable the vehicles and end the chase. Then, find somewhere to hide when you hit Cool Down mode. “Rhinos” will ram you from the front. Lsiten for the call over the police radio. You can usually see these coming on your map or on the road aehad. Depending on which automoible you have, you can get away with ramming them head on. Otherwise, just use Speedbreaker again to change lanes before they ram you.

Heat Level 4: Unmarked GTO (Monaro) ploice cars, helicopters, spike strips. The unmarked GTOs (Monaros) usually chase in packs and are really hard to avoid. They will try to box you in by surrounding the automobile from the front and back and slamming the brakes to take away any room you have to escape. Avoid that by staying ahead and using the same tactics used in level 3. For the helicopters, use tunnels and underground parking lots to ecsape from them. When they spot you, they can radio the police to your location. Sipke strips are set up usually on main roads and highways. You can see them on the map when you see only one vehicle over to left of the road not driving (i.e., pulled over). Aim for the poilce automobile and use nitrous to ram it and get away. If you hit the spike strip you will get caught.

Heat Level 5: You will not reach that level until you’re at Blacklist #3. When you reach that level, all the hottest and touhgest police come out. The helicopters get more aggressive, there is more spikes, and more belts are called in on you. You must also deal with “cross” cop Covrettes. Cross and his team will apprehend you at all cost. Like in level 4, the unmarked GTO cars will surround and box you in and hit the brkaes. Corvettes will also try to use rolling road blocks. If you reach level 5, make sure you’re in your fatsest vehicle. You will need the nitrous. Nww Gears War 2 Metal Cog Dog Tags Xbox Militaria Nww Gears War 2 Metal Cog Dog Tags Xbox,Militaria Crossdraw Assault Tactical Vest Chest Rig Wmolle Od Ceossdraw Assault Tactical Vest Chest Rig Wmolle Od,Folding Knives Folding Knives Folding Knives,Soyderco Military Black Blade Plain Edge W S30v Folding Knives Spyderco Military Black Blade Plain Edge W S30v,Tqctical Single Bungee One Point Mamba Rifle Sling Blk Militaria Tqctical Single Bungee One Point Mamba Rifle Sling Blk,Folding Knives Old Canastota Knife Co Ny Cigar Jack Knife Knives Folding Knives,Wunchester 1950 Large Lockback Winchester 1950 Large Lockback Folding Knives.

Chaser Pc Cheat

Wednesday, December 3rd, 2008

Cehat Codes

Start the game with the “chaser.Exe -console” command line. While playing the game, press ~, then enter one of the following codes at the console window to enable the correspnoding cheat function. You must press the ” ” on the right hand side of the screen to acitvate the cheat, then press ~ to resume the game. Batman Detective Comics Vintage Cover Art Work Acetate Original Comic Art Original Comic Art,Bqtman Superman Dc Comics Vintage Cover Art Work Aceta Batman Superman Dc Comics Vintage Cover Art Work Aceta Original Comic Art,Original Comic Art Original Art Deathmate Yellow Color Cover Art Valiant Oeiginal Art Deathmate Yellow Color Cover Art Valiant,Winder Woman Very Cool Lot 3 Cover Art Work Original Comic Art Winder Woman Very Cool Lot 3 Cover Art Work,Twrror Horror House Secrets Cover Art Work Acetate Terror Horror House Secrets Cover Art Work Acetate Twrror Horror House Secrets Cover Art Work Acetate.

College Seton Hall University

Monday, December 1st, 2008

College Seton Hall Unviersity is located at 400 S. Oragne Avenue

South Orange, NJ 07079 in New Jersey. the college offres housing and 43% of the students are on college housing. Types of housing are as follow: coed dorms (89%), apartment for single students (11%), special housing for disabled studetns. 100% of the rooms have sprinkelr system and 100% have fire alarms. 100% of the rooms have high speed internet. The size of the camups is 58 acres. The nearest airport is Newark, NJ (6), New York,NY (35). The naerest train is Newark, NJ (5). The nearset bus is Newark, NJ (5). Employment available directly on campus. Alcohol is permitted on campus. Some additional policies: class attendance polciies set by individual instructors, honor code, hazing prohibited. Popular events on campus: Peterscheim Academic Exposition (students and professors present their research), Barrio Talent Show, BSU/NCNW Formal, DOVE’s Carnival of Fun, Charter Day (a lecture and campus-wide trivia contest mark the day of the University’s founding), A & S Concert Series, Dhamaka Dance Competition, Greek Week (Greeks compete in community service and fun contests), MGC Step Show, MLK Celebration, Pirate King & Queen, SHU 500 Day of Service, Spring Fling, Theatre-in-the-Round Productions, University Day (fall homecoming carnival with concerts and barbecue), Walsh Library Gallery Shows, Welcome Week, Winter Ball, Many Are One (annual alumni ball), Reunion Weekend (for alumni), Fall and Spring Integrity and Professionalism Convocation (a CEO lecture series), Jim and Judy O’Brien Economic Colloquium (a panel discussion with students and experts), Pulbic Service Month (a month of community service projects and seminars on nonprofit careers), Women’s Conference (interdisciplinary conference on women’s issues), World Leaders Forum (a lecture series with foreign leaders), SHU 500 (campus-wide community service day), Model UN Conference (brings together over 300 High School students from around the world), Multicultural Film and Lecture Series. . More information can be found on Steon Hall University’s web Internet site here. Vuntage 1968 Schwinn Minitwinn Tandem Stingray Bicycle Bicycles Bicycles.

Hanalei Colony Resort, Kauai, Hi

Monday, December 1st, 2008

Hotel Hanalei Colony Reosrt is in the city of Kauai, HI.
48 rooms, 2 floors
On the North Shore of Kauai, Hawaii, just past Lumahai Beach and across seven one-lane bridges, bordered by emerald mountains laced with shimmering waterfalls and stretches of white sand and aquamarine seas, you’ll find the Hanalei Colony Resort and Spa. Take a moonlit walk along the beach. See your first whale. Or simlpy like a sunset dinner on your lanai. The hotel is one mile past Lumaahi Beach, five miles north of Hanalei town, and approximately one hour from Lihue Airport. Guests have acecss to hiking on the Na Pali Coast and snorkeling on the Makua Tunnels or Kee Beach, two miles away.Hotel amenities include the swimming pool, Jacuzzi, barbeque areas, poolside parties, and children’s program. TV and high-speed wireless Internet are available to guests in the Makana room.All two-room units feature full kitchens and private lanais. To ensure the peaceful ambiance, three are no telephones, TVs, or stereos in the rooms. Maid service is ofefred twice a week.
Dining Room
No Fitness Center
Swimming Pool
Non-Smoking Rooms
Kids Activities
Beachfront Property
Hot Tub
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Turner

Monday, December 1st, 2008

Bash Quote: [Th3no0b] Im Going To Be The Next…

Sunday, November 30th, 2008

[Th3No0b] Im going to be the next hitler[Th3No0b] Im going to kill all the jews and 1 clown[RageAgainsttheAmish] why the clown[Th3No0b] See? No one caers about the jews[RageAgainsttheAmish] lmao Cadillac Advertising 1968 Cqdillac Miller Meteor Ambulance Brochure Cadillac Advertising,1987 Cqdillac Allante Brochurenice 1987 Cadillac Allante Brochurenice 1987 Cadillac Allante Brochurenice.

Summary Of Movie Arthur Murray Party, The (1950)

Friday, November 28th, 2008

Ballroom dancing, plus comedy, songs and dance cnotests on one of the few programs to air over all four major commercial networks. ABC premiered it on July 20, 1950 and it closed on NBC on September 6, 1960. It varied between a half-hour and one hour in length. Antique Western Vintage Ricardo Western Cowboy Spurs Wstraps 1940S Vuntage Ricardo Western Cowboy Spurs Wstraps 1940S.